Lady Slings The Booze

We've returned safely from Las Vegas. Well, I have anyhow. MDH is still wandering about the country and on his way to Boston for his high school reunion. Party animal. He actually packed two separate suitcases and left one in the car, switched them out when the red eye landed and got right back on another plane and kept right on going. He has the stamina for such things. I on the other hand drove an hour back to GR, picked up the cat from boarding and plonked my dragging ass right into bed where I have been languishing (conked completely out) for the last 6 hours with a homesick cat purring insanely on my head.


I had been awake for nearly 30 hours, unless you want to count the 3 or so hours during the flight when I dozed in and out between the sounds of crying babies (who brings a baby on a red eye?), the inane overly loud conversations of strangers and the yanking of my seat by the elderly man sitting behind me who used my headrest for leverage every time he stood up which seemed like every 5 minutes.

I have consumed more alcohol on this adventure than I have since my early 20's. Good alcohol. The bulk of which included an amazing Caesar's Palace Diamond Club exclusive champagne cocktail. I don't remember the name but it had champagne (duh), Ketel One vodka, Chambord, and a secret ingredient the bartender would not reveal but I suspected to be either grapefruit juice or peyote, served in a sugar rimmed martini glass. They were free, dee-lish and pretty to look at. The combination of these three things caused me to drink about 12 of these over the course of 3 nights.

MDH's brother, a Boston mail carrier who recently moved to Las Vegas, joined us for many of our excursions. Brother is very old school Vegas in an East Coast transplant kind of way, slicked back hair, leathery tan. He has a Cambridge accent so thick that at times I don't understand what he's saying, but once I've had a second to decipher his words I'm smiling.

Sawks - The Red Sox
Shawts - Shorts
Shayt - Shirt
Hoff Tame - Half Time
Foy-ly-age - Foliage
Hosses - Horses
Ey-Pot - Airport
Pey-Dah - his son Peter

Brother treated us to an evening of comedy where we got to see Jon Fisch
who made me laugh out loud for his entire set. Alan liked him so much he bought a CD.

We had dinner one night as Mesa Grill where the food was good, the wine was superb, and the service was kind of a let down.

Gambling and gaming? I hang my head in shame when I tell you this; I believe we have been bumped from Diamond to Seven Stars status.

Our room on the 39th floor overlooked the beautiful fountains of Bellagio so every 15 minutes or so we were treated to booming music and prancing waters (wah-dah). We were treated as well to the cacophony of construction noise which began remarkably every morning at 7:30AM sharp (shahp) with some kind of crane that bleeps with exactly the same sound as my alarm clock (al-ham clahk) at home.

The camera along with all the pictures we took is traveling with Alan still. So to give you an overall feel of my experience I have put up a picture of me during our family trip to Disney World for my 6th birthday. I was sober then, but equally pampered and spoiled.

PS - dig those crooked bangs on my rockin shag haircut man

UPDATE 10/15/2007 - Because my friend Stephanie thought I came up with the title Lady Slings the Booze all by myself I need to let you know that I did not. It's the title of a science fiction novel by Spider Robinson. I didn't want to take credit for being so clever. Here's a link if you want to check it out.