Showing posts with label meme. Show all posts
Showing posts with label meme. Show all posts

Saturday, December 19, 2009

The Happy Meme

The Vegetable Assassin tagged everyone for a meme and I normally might wiggle out and try ignore such directives, with the excuse that I didn't think they meant me, but lately I could use a meme listing 10 things that make me happy and being non-specifically tagged by my friend Veg is just the push I needed to get started.

I decided to do a photo meme of 10 things that make me happy. I took most of these pictures today.


1. My big green bamboo bowl filled with tangerines. This makes me happy every time I look at it for several reasons, not the least of which is that I happen to have a thing for big giant bowls and green ones in particular. I also love my big green bamboo bowl filled with tangerines because it was a very thoughtful gift from my mom. We were shopping in a store together and she must have noticed me eye-balling and dry humping this bowl. I didn't buy it, but I also didn't say anything to anyone about it either and thought I was being all low-key, so I was thrilled silly when she sent it to me for my birthday a few months later. I should dry hump things in stores more often.

Tangerines also make me happy. I love them and the ones in the bowl are also a present from my mom. She has them shipped to me each year from a citrus grove down the road from where she and my dad live in Florida. These tangerines are amazing, yummy and juicy, but they aren't very user friendly. They're very pithy and overloaded with seeds - so I slice them into quarters and eat them while leaning over the kitchen sink. The rinds make the garbage disposal smell good too.


2. A nice cuppa. I love tea. Hot or iced. It is difficult for me to remain in a bad mood if there is a cup of fragrant, lovely tea sitting before me. I always have tea in the house (loose leaf) and in the summer there is always a fresh pitcher of iced tea in the fridge. I make it every day. It's delicious and loaded with anti-oxidants and how often does that happen? That something you love is actually good for you?? Above in the photo is today's tea selection served in my $20 hardware store teapot. The tea is Scottish Breakfast and is dark black, malty in flavor and tastes great with a little cream (fat-free half and half) and sugar (Splenda). I find that the ritual of making the tea is very calming and you can't rush through making a decent cup of tea. If I'm in a hurry I grab a cup of coffee or have nothing at all. (I hope the chemicals in the Splenda don't cancel out the health benefits of the anti-oxidants)


3. Watching my $9 potted amaryllis from Target grow. It started off grotesque, appearing to be bald baby skull half buried in the soil of the shiny silver pot and has slowly begun to morph into a fully erect and proud phallic staff of weirdness. It's fascinating and it changes every day. I'm given to understand that eventually a big red flower will bloom. In the meantime I'm enjoying it from a distance, although I do sprinkle a little water on it from time to time and occasionally poke it with a stick.

4. Eating in restaurants and trying new foods. When I was growing up we didn't have a lot of money so we didn't eat out very often and when we did it was always the same places over and over again. My parents weren't and still aren't very adventurous eaters and there were tons of foods I never tried or had even heard of until later in my life. I never had Mexican or Chinese food until I was well into my 20's and the first time I had Indian food was about 6 years ago, well into my 30's. I don't care if a restaurant is fancy or expensive necessarily, but I love to experiment and try new things. For the most part I like everything and I'll eat just about anything except organs, eyeballs, ball-balls, etc.. A lady has to drawn the line somewhere. At least this lady does.

5. Wandering around grand old neighborhoods looking at grand old houses. My dream house is giant rambling Queen Anne on a teeny-weeny lot that has more bricks than grass. And big old trees. The house in the picture is one I took in a Louisville neighborhood that I wandered around in with MDH a few years ago.


6. Traveling anywhere on earth with MDH. Sometimes he gets nutty and plans things without me, and sometimes he let's me take care of everything, but mostly we plan all the big trips together. It's so much fun, the anticipation and build up, deciding where to stay and eat and what to do and then when it finally arrives and it's happening... well there's simply nothing else like it. Every time we fly together, we hold hands just as the plane starts taking off and when the plane leaves the ground we say to each other "Here we are!", as in we did all this planning and here we are, off on our adventure. It's what I had engraved on the inside of his wedding band. I waited all my life to meet someone like MDH who wanted to travel and experience the world and do it NOW rather than waiting. Traveling with MDH also entails some other things that make me happy like staying in nice hotels, eating in restaurants and wandering around grand old neighborhoods.


7. When things are surprisingly uncomplicated. It doesn't take much to set me off and make me furious, but it also doesn't take much to make me happy either. I had trouble finding a picture for this one - so here is picture I took when we were on Kauai last January.
  • Being the first person in line at a check out.
  • Getting an appointment for a haircut within the same week that I call.
  • Going into a store and finding exactly what I was looking for and getting out quickly.
  • In Michigan you don't have to physically go to the BMV to renew your driver's license - they send you a new one with the same old picture, get this, in the mail. It's awesome. Not having to go to the BMV makes me happy.
8. Sparkling Shiraz. It's my new favorite wine. I tried some a few months ago and now I'm totally hooked. It goes with everything.


9. My cat Turtle. I love his funny little furface. There are moments when I'd like to drop kick his hairy ass through our plate glass window, like when I bust him chewing electrical wires or drinking the water from the Christmas tree pan, but otherwise, he's pretty groovy. He doesn't jump up on the counters or pee anywhere other than where he's supposed to. Mostly he does all the things you'd want a pet cat to do - he plays with toys and looks all ferocious and cute at the same time and lays on my lap to be petted.

10. Clean sheets and towels. There is nothing quite like burying your face into a warm and fluffy freshly washed bath towel straight from the dryer or flopping onto a bed newly made up with warm soft sheets that still smell of fabric softener. It's also great to step out of the shower and onto a warm and freshly washed bath mat.

I expect I shouldn't really have to tag anyone for this meme since Veg was crystal clear that we were all to do it. In fact you've had plenty of time to complete this assignment and should be done with yours by now. Let's see it.

Monday, August 17, 2009

A Guest Post from My Cat Turtle

My owner-lady can't come to the blogs right now because she's too damn depressed and uninspired. More lap for me, less blog for you I guess. Meanwhile she has asked me to write a guest post which is quite a stretch for me considering that my brain is only the size of a walnut and my front paws are declawed which makes typing a bitch.

Anyhoo... (my owner-lady told me to say that) I thought I would take this opportunity to do that Bernard Pivot/Proust questionnaire that James Lipton does on Inside the Actor's Studio


1. What is your favorite word?
Chicken.


2. What is your least favorite word?
No!


3. What turns you on creatively, spiritually or emotionally?
Being told "No!" often inspires me to keep trying that much harder to go after the things that I want. I'm also a big proponent of napping.

4. What turns you off?
People who are duplicitous. Also getting wet, it's so undignified.


5. What is your favorite curse word?
Motherfucker. I say it all the time!


6. What sound or noise do you love?
The sound of children laughing, rain tapping gently on the roof, the can opener, and crinkling paper.


7. What sound or noise do you hate?
The vacuum cleaner.


8. What profession other than your own would you like to attempt?
Dancer.


9. What profession would you not like to do?
Accountant. Bo-ring!


10. If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates?
Jump up here on the counter and have some chicken!


Sunday, July 5, 2009

Two Great Tastes That Taste Great Together

My blogger friend Tara gave me an award weeks ago and I hope she will forgive me for taking so long to respond. Not only is it an award, but it's an award that has strings attached in the form of a meme. Yes. How cool is that? An award and a meme. It's a sensation like chocolate and peanut butter they just go together and I'm thrilled for the recognition.


It's all girly with frills, ruffles and afternoon tea.


It is cute, no?


Anyhoo... I've been meaning to respond for quite a while now and was finally able to take a moment and sneak away from job hunting and entertaining my mother in law who is (still) visiting from Boston.

Excuses, excuses. I always feel terrible when you all leave such lovely comments on my blog and I never seem to have the time to leave any on your blogs. For the record though I am actually reading your blogs every day with my Google Reader when I'm at work although I can't sign into Blogger to leave comments on them.

No worries though, soon I'll be out of a job and I'll have all the time in the world for blogging. Heh, heh. Oy.

And now... the meme portion of my post:

5 Obsessions

1. Finding a job before my current contract is up in September.

2. The prevention of fine lines and tiny wrinkles. It consumes me and sometimes I feel like the shallowest person on the planet.

3. The Little Stranger by Sarah Waters

4. The recipe for “Sunday Beans” in last weeks New York Times Magazine. I can’t wait to make this.

5. My hair. I need a haircut desperately. I’m a total freak of female-ness in that, aside from the occasional and inexplicable root perm or brunette color job I for some reason subject myself to every couple of years, most of the time I really like my hair. Unfortunately I keep forgetting to schedule an appointment and now I'm about 12 weeks gone with no hair cut. I'm looking quite dreary. To add insult to my scarecrow head I just learned that my stylist has reduced her hours to part time in order to spend more time with her infant son and it has become nearly impossible to get an appointment with her. Damn baby.

5 Dislikes

1. My hair stylist’s baby.

2. Bad service at a doctor’s office. I had to find a new OBGYN (again) because I refuse to be treated so horribly for a service that we pay so much money for. I waited in the waiting room for 45 minutes until they finally put me in an examination room where I waited for an additional 30 minutes while wearing nothing more than a paper towel. I finally left. I got dressed first of course. I wonder though - how much longer would they have left me there? I never heard from them either. They never called to see if I was OK or find out what might have happened to me. Assholes.

3. The Bachelorette. I’d never seen this show before, but MDH and I watched it this week with my mother in law. Not that I don’t watch my share of terrible TV, but this was particularly bad.

4. Men who wear cowboys hats for no discernible reason. Unless it’s Halloween, if you live in Michigan or parts east of Oklahoma and the like, and don’t own a horse, a herd of cattle or a piece of property larger than a quarter of an acre you have no business wearing a cowboy hat.

5. Flat screen TV’s are everywhere. Have you noticed this? The hotel we stayed at in Syracuse last week had a flat screen over every elevator, like 2 elevators next to each other and both of them had a flat screen TV over it, on every floor. The hotel also had flat screen TV's in every hallway, sitting area and public space. It was maddening. I felt like there was no escape.

5 Tagged & Awarded:

I'm going to stick with the girly theme of the award like Tara did. A couple are the usual suspects, but I've thrown in a couple of bloggers I read regularly but rarely comment on:

Gwen
CDP
Miss Minneapolis
The Vegetable Assassin
Boredmando - Ha! I bet you didn't think I was paying attention didja?

Monday, May 4, 2009

A Very Long Meme Just for You

My back is out again. Two times in less than 4 weeks. I'm scared people. I've finally found a doctor and I'm going to make an appointment today (no worries).

Anyhoo... I'm feeling good enough to sit in my office chair today and complete this meme that I found at Untitled Blogger Project (I've been lurking over there for awhile and have finally added him to my blog roll) who in turn got it from A World So Small. The woman who writes A World So Small is English (I assume) so I had to translate some parts of the meme (pounds to dollars, favourite to favorite, etc..) to American to avoid any confusion. Those whacky Brits and the rest of the English speaking world outside the US of A and their crazy spellings!

What is your current obsession?
Oddly enough considering that last paragraph, I am recently obsessed with anything having to do with Charles Dickens. I blame Masterpiece Classic. They’ve given us the most amazing version of Oliver Twist that I cannot imagine will ever be topped with Timothy Spall as a most sympathetic Fagin. They’ve replayed the version of David Copperfield from several years back (starring the adorable Daniel Radcliffe) and given us Little Dorrit. I’d never read Little Dorrit so I was waiting for each new episode with giggling glee.

This week it’s The Old Curiosity Shop, which I have also never read and know almost nothing about. I recorded the first episode on the DVR last night, but sadly must wait until next week when MDH comes home from Texas as I have infected him with the Dickens obsession now too and he would be very upset if I watched it without him.

What is your weirdest obsession?
See above… but MDH would probably tell you my weirdest obsession is The Sims. Speaking of which, The Sims 3 releases next month. I'm giddy.

What are you wearing today?
An old, faded Mickey Mouse t-shirt, black stretchy pants and my most comfy slippers. It’s a stay home from work with back pain outfit.

What's for dinner today?
I don’t even care. I’m home alone, MDH is conveniently out of town and my back hurts again, so I’ll just take whatever looks good that’s in reach, cram it into my mouth and start chewing. The cat had better stay clear away.

Why is today special?
I am able to stand up straight without grimacing for the first time since Friday and I found a new doctor.

What would you like to learn to do?
Play bluegrass fiddle.

What languages can you speak?
English and I know enough French to avoid ordering organs and innards in restaurants. I don’t care how artful and lovingly kidneys or intestines are prepared, I don’t want to put them in my mouth.

What are you listening to right now?
The fan on my computer humming and birdies chirping outside the window.

What is your favorite weather?
When there is a bit of coolness in the air, like early mornings in the summer. Jacket weather. Today.

What is your most challenging goal right now?
Trying to maintain my self-esteem and a positive attitude after not getting the jobs I wanted (and deserved).

What do you think about the person who tagged you?
Well, I tagged myself didn't I? So I’ll say adorable and back pain-tastic.

If you could have a house totally paid for, fully furnished, anywhere in the world, where would you like it be?
Fourth Street, Victorian Village in Columbus Ohio. I like to dream big. It’s only a few blocks over from where we used to live. I always liked the houses on that street, a wee bit fancier than ours. The location is perfect. Off street parking, walking distance to the Short North, close to the park, close to the highway, close to all my good friends that I love and miss so much. (That picture is from the front porch of our old house in Vic Village).

What would you like to have in your hands right now?
A grilled cheese and tomato sandwich.

What would you like to get rid of?
I’ve already bitched out it on this blog several times – our hot tub. It’s an unsightly disgrace and a blight on our back yard.

If you could go anywhere in the world for the next hour, where would you go?
You know, I’m pretty happy right here at home in my office. Here I go, dreaming big again. I’ve got the blinds thrown all the way open and I can see our beautiful back yard (the hot tub is out of view from here). Turtle is lounging in the open window (and yes, I opened it myself - the office window is easy), looking so regal, and I can hear birdies chirping. What else could I ask for?

Which language do you want to learn?
Portuguese. I love that “shush, shush” sound that they have at the end of so many of their words. It’s soft and sexy.

What do you look for in a friend?
I know it when I see it. Mainly though, I look for a certain kind of knowing appreciation for the ridiculous. I have to be able to laugh with my friends.

Who do you want to meet in person?
I would love to go to a mixer featuring all of the people who write the blogs on my blog roll. And Laird Hamilton.

What's your favorite type of music?
I like almost all types of music as long as it is genuine and required a modicum of talent to create. My current “most recently played” list on my iPod features Charles Mingus, Diana Krall, New Order and Joy Division pretty heavily.

What's the favorite piece of clothing in your own closet?
My new jeans. I just got them back from the tailor (of course) and they are perfect in every way.

What is your dream job?
In real life I’d like to be a Project Manager or Training Manager.

In fantasy land I’d be a Therapist or an Advice Columnist.

Any favorite models?
Fuck no. I think it’s idiotic and totally insane that people are famous and worshipped to the degree that they are just for being nice to look at. Do something else.

If you had $100 now, what would you spend it on?
A new spine.

Favorite designer?
Karl Lagerfeld

Fashion pet peeve?
The list is long (and so is this meme! hello? are you still reading this?), but here are some top contenders:


1. Fake tans by themselves are bad enough, but I especially hate them when combined with fashion pet peeve #2.


2. People who have freakishly overly whitened teeth. You look like a clown. A scary clown.

3. Muffin top. Nobody wants to see your gut hanging out.

4. That messy, uncombed hairstyle on regular men. I'm speaking to you co-worker. You are not handsome enough to pass this off. Unless you are David Beckham (and you are not) then messy, uncombed hair, no matter how much product you use, makes you look like you just escaped from the loony hatch.


5. I firmly believe that the faux-hawk is the mullet of the new millenium. It's over guys. Stop it.

Do you admire anyone's style?
My blogger friend WendyB. She posts lots of pictures of herself (she won the coveted Drysdale Award last year in the category of "Blog with the Most Pictures of the Blogger") at glamorous parties and locales. Somehow she always looks completely different, but always, always looks beautiful and the epitome of stylish.

Describe your personal style:
Tailored. I’m significantly overweight (it’s the truth, I’m just being honest, not self depreciating), so I like to make sure that my clothes fit properly and that (in public at least) I look put together at all times. I take a lot of my clothes to be tailored to make sure I get the best fit possible. My worst fear (fashion-wise I mean, my actual worst fear is a tie between being trampled to death in a large crowd of people and having all of my teeth fall out) would be that someone would describe me as looking “sloppy”.

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Million Movie Meme

I wrote this post late Saturday afternoon and didn't have time to finish it before I had to get ready for my night out with the girls. Then I didn't get home until past midnight by which time we had had a terrible storm and lost power for the next 16 hours or so. It took me freakin' forever to write this hog because of all the pictures and links and by this point I'm just bloody sick of looking at it, so I apologize here in advance for any weird grammar or spelling errors.

With an intro like that I'm sure you are bursting at the seams to read this now.

I'm going to refrain from air kissing myself to avoid adding any extra strain to my already overtaxed neck. Yes. I've tagged myself for a meme, since nobody else would. I don't want to name any names here Tara.

Anyhoo... it's a movie meme and I couldn't resist because I love movies almost as much as I love eating and breathing.

There are just too many movie answers for me to choose from, so I have blatantly stolen an idea from New York Magazines weekly feature The Approval Matrix, where they section off Brilliant and Despicable things by labeling them either Highbrow or Lowbrow. I adore this feature. You can click on the image on the left to see the full size version of this weeks Approval Matrix. (I'm not sure how Rachel Ray and Dunkin' Donuts ended up on the Highbrow side.)

My movie meme will answer each question in the meme with the (Lowbrow) title of a mainstream, big name studio movie and with the (Highbrow) title of a lesser known or possibly totally unknown independent or foreign film or any combination of these things. This is my blog so I get to stand in judgment on what's Lowbrow and what's Highbrow - if you disagree leave it in the comments.

1. One that made you laugh:
Movie: Blazing Saddles (1974) - Because I can never resist a fart joke or anything with Madeline Kahn (RIP).

Film: Flirting with Disaster (1996) - I laughed throughout the entire thing and had to watch it again because I missed so much from laughing the first time.

2. One that made you cry:
Movie: Beaches (1988) - the whole thing with the dying and the daughter. It's just too much and I'm a huge Bette Midler fan. The music gets me every time.

Film: Hilary & Jackie (1998) - based on a true story, the whole thing with the success and the madness and the love of two sisters, plus it stars two actors I adore: Emily Watson and Rachel Griffiths. Also has great music.

3. One movie you loved when you were a child (I will eliminate the Highbrow/Lowbrow element here because as kid I didn't know the difference or really care. I'm going to list a few that I still love to this day and you may also notice that they are all pretty old. We didn't have a lot of money for going to the movies when I was a kid so I watched old movies on TV all the time):

Gigi (1958) - In retrospect the premise is probably a bit racy because it's about a little girl who is being groomed to become a courtesan, but I loved the songs, the costumes, and the fancy manners.

Harvey (1950) - What little kid wouldn't want to hang around with a guy who had an invisible 7 foot rabbit wearing a waistcoat and pocket watch for a best friend?

We can also include here anything with Cary Grant, Doris Day and Fred Astaire.

4. One you’ve seen more than once (I'll lean this one more toward movies that I will watch whenever I notice that they are on TV. There could be 15 minutes left and I will watch them anyway.):

Movie: When Harry Met Sally (1989)

Film: Cold Comfort Farm (1995) tied with Amelie (2001)

5. One you loved, but were embarrassed to admit it I'm going to dispense withe Highbrow/Lowbrow here too. I'm not embarrassed, but these are a couple that I didn't expect to love:
There's Something About Mary (1998) - I could not help myself.

Stuart Saves His Family (1995) - Yes. Starring Al Franken as Stuart Smalley, that 12-step program guy from SNL. I do not remember why I rented this stupid thing. I watched it in secret and then laughed so hard that I made all of my friends watch it with me. Trust me. It's really good.

6. One you hated:
Movie - Mr. Hollands Opus - I'm not going to put the year or a link because that would require an IMDB search and that might cause someone at IMDB to think that I give a shit about this movie - what a turd this was. It doesn't even deserve bold font. Forever known to me as Mr. Hollands Anus.

Film - The Cook, The Thief, His Wife & Her Lover (1989) - I actually walked out of this film - crying. I had had enough cringing, gasping and covering my eyes in my friend Dan's armpit in the middle of a fully packed theater. It was in a word; awful.

7. One that scared you:
Movie: 28 Days Later (2002) - I don't watch a lot of scary movies, but I gave this one a shot because I like the director, Danny Boyle.

Film: El Orphanito (2007) - Scary, Spanish, ghostie goodness. Make sure you have already had a good crap before watching.

8. One that bored you: I think I can safely exempt myself from this one. I'm pretty careful with my movie selections, especially if I'm shelling out full price to see it in a theater. If I'm watching it on DVD I simply stop watching. Besides I rarely ever get bored.

9. One that made you happy:
Movie - Pee Wee's Big Adventure (1985) - Never was the tale of a weirdo who lost his bike more delightful.

Film - Juno (2007) - Never was a tale of teen pregnancy more delightful.

10. One that made you miserable:
Movie - Leaving Las Vegas (1995) - a jolly little fable about a dude who wants to literally drink himself to death. 100% Charm Free.

Film - Fur: An Imaginary Portrait of Diane Arbus (2006) - My bad. I didn't pay close enough attention to the title of this piece of shit and take the word Imaginary to heart. I mean, I know that she was known for being really weird and that she eventually killed herself, but I had hoped for more insight into what made her tick and instead I was treated to middle aged nudists and gargantuan hair clogs. It made me itchy.

11. One movie you weren’t brave enough to see:
Movie - Any of those Police Academy things.

Film - Cloverfield (2008) - OK - I doubt that this is highbrow, but I can't think of anything else at the moment, and I know for certain that I do not want to see this thing. Not because it's too scary, but because I heard the camera work was not dissimilar to The Blair Witch Project, which caused me to get motion sickness and spend the second half of the film in the ladies room puking my guts up. No film is good enough for me to go through that again.

12.
One movie character you’ve fallen in love with (oddly both of these characters appear naked in their respective stories):
Movie - Jason Segel's cleverly named character, Jason in the movie Knocked Up (2007).

Film - Julian Sands as George Emerson from the Ivory Merchant A Room with a View (1985). Upon deep reflection I have just realized that Julian Sands was the first man I ever saw naked. Of course in the same scene in which Julian Sands is naked you also see Simon Callow's penis bouncing around as well. Some of you may remember Mr. Callow as the chubby bearded guy that keels over from a heart attack and dies in Four Weddings and a Funeral. I choose Julian Sands as my happy memory even though he went on to totally bum me out by making that horrible Warlock movie.

Just to qualify I did not fall in love with George Emerson because I saw Julian Sands naked. George was a romantic guy (and not bad to look at either) who knew exactly what he wanted with Lucy Honeychurch and by the end of the story completely transforms her. In the movie George lives and that is how I like to remember him. I read the book about 5 years after I first saw that movie and was devastated to learn that his character dies in the war and that Ivory/Merchant kind of butchered EM Forrester's book, but I really don't care. I like it better when I think of George and Lucy living forever in love in that damn window.

13. The last one you saw (I'll qualify this with - in a theater):
Movie - Indiana Jones & the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (2008) - S'ok.

Film - Miss Pettigrew Lives for a Day (2008) - I wrote about this already.

14.
The next movie you hope to see:
How about the next movie I'm going to see? Because I don't just dream it baby - I live it. It's Sex & the City and I'm going to do the whole cliche all the way and see it with my girlfriends after dinner and drinks this very evening. Minus the expensive heels. Fuck that - I'm wearing flip-flops.

15. Tag Five People:
I'm only going to tag one person. The only person I can think of that loves movies more than me, and whose opinion of movies I value more than any other - yes my friend Dan - I mean you Dan G.

C'mon! Write us up a little something. It's about movies, you know you want to. Don't make me beg. Write!

Saturday, April 19, 2008

Mini Meme

I'm going to plant a couple of air kisses on Mr. Radloff for tagging me for a meme! He did it a few days ago, but I've been a little busy and then I had an attitude problem and now that that is all taken care of I'm free to meme.

1) Write your own six word memoir
2) Post it on your blog; include a visual illustration if you’d like
3) Link to the person that tagged you in your post, and to the original post if possible
4) Tag at least five more blogs with links
5) Leave a comment on the tagged blogs with an invitation to play!

When you add together how much I love to go on and on about myself and the somewhat flowery nature of my writing style this meme is is going to be a little challenging for me.

In order to pare things down appropriately I've decided that my 6 word memoir will only cover up to age 4.

It's OK because a lot happened.

1. Abandoned - at 6 months old left by my biological mother on my dad's doorstep with a paper grocery sack filled with diapers and baby clothes.
2. Bounced - my dad couldn't take care of me either so I lived with a bunch of different relatives until he could get settled.
3. Dragged - when my dad wasn't working he wanted to spend time with me so took me with him everywhere he went, mainly to bars and poker games and never to a lecture. I was like a tiny drinkin' buddy. (See picture above)
4. Adopted - my dad and I were a package deal so when he met my mom she legally adopted me. It's probably the best thing that could have happened for both me and my dad. My mom is pretty awesome.
5. Meltdown - I had a hard time adjusting to our new "normal" life style and made life very difficult for my mom.
6. Sister - Things calmed down after my sister was born and we were like a real family.
I'm tagging Gwen, Linka, Kate, WendyB and Leonesse

Wednesday, March 5, 2008

Quickie Bookish Meme

Air kisses are going out to Tara for tagging me for the following meme:

1. Pick up the nearest book (of at least 123 pages).
2. Open the book to page 123.
3. Find the fifth sentence.
4. Post the next three sentences.
5. Tag five people.

The closest book happens to be Anna Karenina by Leo Tolstoy. I haven't read it yet, but it's next in the stack I keep on my bed table. It's an old copy that MDH had when he was at UMass, but it still smells brand new.

Here is the 5th sentence:
But immediately as though slipping his feet into old slippers, he dropped back into the light-hearted, pleasant world he had always lived in.

And the next 3 after...

The coffee was never really made, but spluttered over every one and boiled away, doing just what was required of it - that is, providing cause for much noise and laughter, and spoiling a costly rug and the baroness's gown.

"Well now, good-bye, or you'll never get washed, and I shall have on my conscience the worst sin a gentleman can commit. So you would advise a knife to his throat?"

I don't normally tag people but I'll make an exception this time since this is a pretty innocuous meme.

I choose:

Aunt Dahlia
Gwen (EILCC)
I'm Playing Outside
R-Cubed
a
nd last but never least
Heidi at Viking Conquest


It would have been pretty fun if the nearest book had been something embarassing like The World of Mr. Winkle or one of MDH's scary corporate self help books about "power selling" or some such nonsense. But this would never happen because these books are hidden from sight so that people won't find out that we are tools.

Saturday, January 26, 2008

Orange Stained Meme Whore

I've been tagged again and I don't mind because I'm a meme whore. Meme's are especially good for days like today when I feel like writing something but have absolutely nothing good to say (even though the lady carding me for wine at the grocery today said she thought I looked like I was in my 20's which normally thrills me).

Many air kisses are going out to Renaissance Woman for perking me up by tagging me to share 6 non important things/habits/quirks about yourself. .

1. I always wear a watch, even to bed. I take it off to shower, otherwise it's on my wrist. I have waterproof sports watches to wear on vacations where I'll be swimming or snorkeling. Last January I left the house in a hurry to catch a flight and forgot to put my watch back on after I showered. I was practically twitching and shivering until my layover flight in Minneapolis. Once there I busted my ass running for a store I knew sold watches so I could buy a new one before my next flight left on the other side of the airport. I paid way too much, but the idea of being away from home working in the middle of nowhere without a watch was unbearable.

2. I think it sounds really trite when people say "I love him/her to death". What the fuck is that supposed to mean anyway? In my mind it's just a way of qualifying that you're not an asshole because it always seems to be followed by "but" and then something not so nice. Just say the not so nice thing and I'll figure out on my own whether or not you "love" the person anyway and are an asshole for saying the not so nice thing about them.

3. It bugs me when someone (these days it's my husband, but he's improving) empties the ice cube trays and puts them back in the freezer without refilling them. I long for a fridge with an ice maker.

4. I love oranges and grapefruits. My mom sends me big boxes of them from the fruit stand near her house in Florida a few times a year. Right now I'm working my way through a box of Honey Bells she sent last week. I eat 2 at a sitting, but I'm a little bummed out because my right thumbnail broke down to the quick the other day and that is my orange peeling nail.

5. I realized yesterday, to my astonishment, that I had gone an entire week and not eaten or drank (drunk? whatever.) anything with sugar in it. It wasn't something I intentionally set out to do but I just haven't had a sweet tooth (and still don't). It probably has a lot to do with the Honey Bells and perhaps is the reason why when I weighed myself this morning I found I've lost 2 lbs.

6. It bums me out when a raindrop or a drip from an awning or something lands directly on my head, right in the middle of where I part my hair, and then just rolls around on my scalp.

Saturday, January 5, 2008

Mrs. Excitement Strikes Again

Skyler's Dad tagged me for a little old meme. What a nice man. Being tagged not only sounds a little naughty, it gives me a reason to write more crap about myself. Hurray! More me!

Here's the rules:

Share 7 random and/or weird facts about yourself on your blog, tag 7 random people at the end of your post and include links to their blogs. Let each person know that they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their blog. I'm not going to tag anybody else, but I'll say the same thing I always say - tag yourself if you'd like to do this meme.

You know I think I did this meme recently and I really don't care that I'm doing it again. I'll do it again and maybe twice more after that because I think that highly of myself. The only reason I may not do it twice more is because I'm already wondering where I'm going to come up with 7 new things about me. Shit. I'm really pretty boring and I think I've already spilled most of the good stuff in previous "random facts about me" memes.

Anyhoo...

1. To get things started with a bang: I have over 100 pair of underpants divided into 4 categories. (How's that for exciting new meme material, eh?)
  • The "A" underwear which fits perfectly, is the newest and most comfortable and leaves no visible line under my clothes. I always have enough for a 2 week trip.

  • The "B" underwear which fits perfectly and is the most comfortable, but is older, and might or might not cause VPL. Usually consists of older model "A's".

  • The "Home" underwear is merely comfortable and never to be worn anywhere but at home. These tend to be on the large and unattractive side of large and unattractive and are usually purchased in bulk.

  • "Eye Candy", sexy, impulse purchase underwear. These fool the eye because they are made from silks, lace or satiny, shiny fabrics that are beautiful, but ultimately a bummer. I don't know why I have them and every time I put a pair on I know somehow it's going to be a mistake. I purposely hide them in the back of the drawer but occasionally stumble across them and say to myself, "how pretty, why don't I ever wear these?" Then two hours later I remember the panties are either too small and have been slowly disappearing into my butt crack and causing a rash, or are too large and have fallen down and are now inside out and around my knees under my pants.

2. I hate pesto.

3. I'm a skilled bubble gum blower and can make a bubble inside a bubble. Yeah.

4. One of my boobs is noticably larger than the other and knowing that this is perfectly normal doesn't make me feel any better about it.

5. I have a math phobia. I dropped out of college when I broke my leg, but didn't go back after it healed because I realized that I could go no further in my studies until I took some math classes. When I went back to get my degree 10 years later I placed into the standard math classes, but took the remedial ones anyway, because it was so hard for me. I also did all of my work twice, homework and tests. I'd do the problems once and then do them again to check my work against myself.

6. I have no idea who half of the people on "Cribs" are.

7. On the outside I'm all cool, but on the inside I'm a sappy freak when it comes to our cat. We got this today when we picked him up from the vet. I smiled and said "thanks guys!", but inside my head I squealed and gushed like I was on the Price Is Right. It's now hanging on the fridge.

Saturday, December 29, 2007

I'm Too Old for This Meme

MDH and I are leaving tomorrow for the bright lights of the big city of Columbus, Ohio to spend New Year's and the rest of next week with all of our lovely friends, most of whom are public school teachers who don't have to go back to work until Jan 7th. Par-tay!

Since MDH has to spend some of our time there working we can charge most of our expenses to the company trough. Hurray! It's what my darling calls a "boondoggle".

Meanwhile, in my absence, I give you the gift of music, via the meme that Constant Drama, that sweet young thing, tagged me for last week. I started filling it out and feeling very old and noticed that my answers were lacking lustre. I decided to spice things up a bit (and because I'm still not over the thrill of having my iPod safely returned from being repaired) and use musical answers from the shuffle feature of my iPod, as in a similar meme I posted on Monday.

This time, however, there is a new and experimental element I've added just for YOU. I've uploaded the musical answers to a file sharing thingy and hopefully you'll be able to click on them and actually download and listen to the songs as you please.

Hope it works! If not, would you please let me know in the comments?

Many thanks to BeckEye from The Pop Eye for inspiring me to try.

1. Name one person who made you laugh last night.
Jack Nicholson. MDH and I watched The Shining.

I Can't Tame Wild Women, by the Hotclub of Cowtown

2. What were you doing at 0800?
I’ve got cotton candy between my ears and find that time reference baffling. So I was either, sleeping, reading, cooking or watching TV.

Wunderlande by Rubin Steiner

3. What were you doing 30 minutes ago?
I was reading blogs, which is how I stumbled across the fact that I had been tagged.

Natural's Not In It by Gang of Four

4. What happened to you in 2006?
I’m old and have a hard time remembering that far back, but I’m sure I was sitting on a lot of airplanes.

That Girl by Stevie Wonder

5. What was the last thing you said out loud?
“That’s not for kitties!”, when the cat tried to eat my cottage cheese.

L'il Ennio by Belly

6. How many beverages did you have today?
Two cups of coffee and a glass of water.

Rockin' the Polanaise by Freddie Bell & The Bellboys

7. What colour is your hairbrush?
Which one? I’ve got 6.

Situation by Yaz

8. What was the last thing you paid for?
This morning I bought 3 city issued bulk garbage tags. My life is THAT exciting.

The Sea by Morcheeba

9. Where were you last night?
Home with my bum firmly planted on the sofa.

Jazzy Bach by Benoit Charest

10. What colour is your front door?
It’s oak with stained glass in an Arts & Crafts pattern.

Paint by Soul Coughing

11. Where do you keep your change?
On the bedroom floor, wherever it lands after it falls out of my pockets, or the dryer.

Mighty, Mighty by Earth Wind & Fire

12. What's the weather like today?
Gray, cold and dismal.

Freakie Hijiki by The Beastie Boys

13. What's the best ice-cream flavour?
I cannot say what’s the best, but my favorites are banana and pistachio.

Brooklyn Recycles by Brooklyn Funk Essencials

14. What excites you?
The current season of Project Runway, getting free shampoo samples in the mail, finding a good parking spot.

Institutionalized by Suicidal Tendencies

15. Do you want to cut your hair?
Not myself, no. That would just look crazy.

My Blue Heaven by Artie Shaw

16. Are you over the age of 25?
I’m 40 and a half.

Lulu by Red Prysock

17. Do you talk a lot?
Not anymore as these days I am often alone. These days I’m typing more than I’m talking, but I can chew the ear off of strangers at the check out register at the grocery store.

Sugar Daddy by Frank Black

18. Do you watch the O.C?
I do not. I do however watch The Real Housewives of Orange County on Bravo.

Quelqu'un M'a Dit by Carla Bruni

19. Do you know anyone named Steven?
Not personally.

It Stops With Me by the Hotclub of Cowtown

20. Do you make your own words?
Yes. It started with my sister when we were little. She couldn’t say God Bless You when someone sneezed so we started saying “Ooh Shom-blay-shen”, and it stuck.

M.O.R. by Blur - Sorry! Can't seem to upload this one.

21. Are you a jealous person?
No.

All Alone by Gorillaz

22. Name a friend whose name starts with the letter 'A'.
Amy

Estrellita by Esquivel

23. Name a friend whose name starts with the letter 'K'.
Kelly with the beautifully trained operatic singing voice.

Ivo by The Cocteau Twins

24. Who's the first person on your received call list?
My cousin Julie


25. What does the last text message you received say?
I have never used text messaging because I am old.

It Ain't Right by Ray Condo and His Richochets

26. Do you chew on the straw?
What? No.

When the Rainbow Comes by World Party

27. Do you have curly hair?
My hair is poker straight.

Hey There Fancy Pants by Ween

28. What's the next place you're going to?
The powder room.

Unnecessarily Mercenary by Bonnie Raitt

29. Who's the rudest person in your life?
My brother in law, Knucklehead.

Kool Thing by Sonic Youth

30. What was the last thing you ate?
A Rosemary & Olive Oil Tricuit with a little cottage cheese on it.

Sunflowers by Wynton Marsalis Septet

31. Will you get married in the future?
It is my goal not to, unless MDH and I renew our vows or something.

In the Backseat by Arcade Fire

32. What was the best movie you've seen in past 2 weeks?
I rewatched The Shining last night, and watched Topsy-Turvy last week.

Movies of Myself by Rufus Wainwright

33. Is there anyone you like right now?
I have no idea how a married woman over the age of 35 should answer this question.

Bullet by Frank Black & The Catholics

34. When was the last time you did the dishes?
Two hours ago.

Sweet Thursday by Pizzicato Five

35. Are you currently depressed?
No


Love Is A Losing Game by Amy Winehouse

37. Why did you answer and post this?
Because I like Constant Drama and wouldn't want to let her down.

Jackson by Johnny Cash & June Carter

38. Tag 5 people who would do this.

No. If you wish to, you can tag yourselves.

A Casual Affair by The Style Council

And there you have it. Whew! Putting all these links in here took me a long time so it better have worked. I probably won't share this many songs at the same time again.

Monday, December 24, 2007

Dream a Little Dream - An iPod Meme

You know how the saying goes. If you love something (or someone), set it free and if it loves you, it'll come back. Well, my iPod loves me, because it came back. I sent it away to HP for repairs at a cost of $75 and it arrived back into my loving hands, just in time for our car trip to Uncle Dan and Aunt P's tomorrow.

I've missed it so.

Weird though, I think they just packed up a new one, or at least gave me a new casing, because it's all shiny and new looking, totally free of scratches and my grimy fingerprints. I'm also pretty sure it's got a different serial number. So in honor of it's return, I did an iPod meme that I found a few weeks ago at Some Goofy Woman's blog.

1. Put your music player on Shuffle
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER WHAT (this is in capital letters, so it is very serious. [Not my comment, but I concur.])

The iPod Sez:

1. IF SOMEONE SAYS “IS THIS OKAY” YOU SAY?
Muleskinner Blues by Deke Dickerson
I was really pleased with this song as the answer.

2. WHAT WOULD BEST DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY?
The Quarterdrawing of the Dog by Siouxsie & The Banshees
This is an instrumental and not one of my favorites, but it’s actually kind of appropriate as it’s dark but hopeful.

3. WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
Darling You and I Are Through by Hotclub of Cowtown
One of my favorite songs by this band, and a good answer to the question as it’s about a girl who likes to feel special and breaks up when she doesn’t.

4. HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?
Ship of Fools by World Party
I’m always in the mood for this song.

5. WHAT IS YOUR LIFE’S PURPOSE?
Tombstone by Suzanne Vega
OK – it’s true. I do like a tombstone and I do try to see the kingdom every now and then.

6. WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?
I’m Just a Killer for Your Love by Blur
Well, I am a people pleaser, but I’m more likely to cook to get your love than kill for it. Maybe in my case it's refering to roasted meats, my specialty.

7. WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
Sightsee MC! by Big Audio Dynamite
It’s up to them to make comments about this songs relation to the question. Amy once told me my theme song was the music played in the Wizard of Oz whenever they show the Wicked Witch or the mean old lady furiously pedaling her bicycle.

8. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR PARENTS?
Vivaldi Concerto in B Flat Major for Cello, RV423, II. Largo by Yo-Yo Ma & Amsterdam Baroque Orchestra
Well it freaked me out when this popped up in answer to the question. It’s so, so sad, but has these really loving undertones. It doesn’t sound like a scotch on the rocks at all. I thought for sure a better song answer would be Caviar & Chittlin's by the Atomic Fireballs, because they wash it all down with Scotch. Then I remembered that it's just a stupid meme.

9. WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
Carve That Possum by Southern Culture On the Skids
I really don't think of roadkill that often, but it’s a good song just the same.

10. WHAT IS 2+2?
Mizz Bed-Stuy by Brooklyn Funk Essentials
I’m not sure I understand the question or the answer, but I was happy to hear the song.

11. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
Piece by Imani Coppola
Wow! This was interesting that this song came up. It’s scary accurate because I’m always wishing for her to have inner peace.

12. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Bayou Blue by Big Sandy & His Fly-Rite Boys
I’m assuming this question has to do with high school kind of “like”, which I’m way to old to fuck around with, plus I’m a married gal. So if we’re talking about my husband, he does have “raven hair and big brown eyes” and we share a mutual love of Big Sandy.

13. WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
Bring On the Dancing Horses by Echo & The Bunnymen
I’m not sure how this works out, but at least it wasn’t Vivaldi again.

14. WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
There’s a House In Harlem For Sale by Ray Condo & His Richochets
Typical, another instrumental. So unless I take my answer from the song title and say realtor, I guess I’ll never know.


15. WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE
Little Motel by Modest Mouse
Again, married, but fairly accurate because we spend so much time apart.

16. WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
Twenty Questions by The Beastie Boys
Cool song answer: “Are we intrinsically separate beings? Or could we possibly be parts of the same thing?”

17. WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
Fighting In a Sack by The Shins
OK this song title in answer to the question made me laugh really hard. Too late though, already married and I'm not sure the Shins were around then. Thank goodness there were lots of other songs for us to dance to.

18. WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
Two Birds by G. Love
I’d be OK with this as a funeral song.

19. WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
Level by The Raconteurs
I do think of myself as an amateur psychologist.

20. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
Pink Thing by XTC
I have no baby secrets. This song is about a love for a baby I've come to find out. Previously I though it might be about a penis. Nope, I was wrong. I went out there and found the lyrics and I'm pleased to note that he does NOT say "Pink thing, sit on my face" as I had previously believed. It's actually "spit in my face" which for some reason isn't much better.

21. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
Hersham Boys by Sham 69
Again, not really. We're we were never called "cockney cowboys", but I'm sure most of us have corduroys and lace up boots in the closet.

22. WHAT SHOULD YOU POST THIS AS?
Dream A Little Dream by The Beautiful South
Allrighty.

Sunday, December 16, 2007

I Hope the Path To Enlightenment Is Heavily Sprayed With Pesticides

Rebecca, a new commenter on my blog has uncovered the true path to my heart (giving me new opportunities to talk about myself) and tagged me. Thanks Rebecca! She has tagged me to share 7 facts about myself.

1. I love White Castle. There, I’ve said it. I don’t eat there, or at any fast food establishment very often, but there are moments when I crave them like nobody’s business. MDH, and many other very smart people with discerning tastes find them disgusting and I heartily agree, but there are times when nothing else will do. It’s probably for the best interest of my arteries and breath that we don’t have them in Grand Rapids. Ordinarily I don’t think about it much, but I’m kinda hungry right now.

2. I love my car. It’s not fancy or anything, but it’s paid for, it goes really fast and has an excellent sound system. Several years ago I was able to pick out any car I wanted regardless of price, co-signature or opinion. Prior to that someone else had always been involved and I ended up with cars I was supremely unhappy with. I will happily drive this car until it falls apart.

3. There are tubes and tubs of lip balm stashed away in every one of my coat pockets, desk drawers, junk drawers and crevices within arms reach of my favored spots around the house and our cars. For me it’s either Burt’s Bees or Blistex Lip Medix (in the dark blue tub). No others will do. Somehow, my lips are still cracked and chapped. Almost every time I do laundry, the sound of an errant lip balm can be heard tumbling around in the spin cycle. I always hope to catch it before it goes into the dryer and makes a big waxy mess.

4. I weigh myself every single day. Twice. Once when I first get up and again after I’ve, well, you know. This has been my habit for about 10 years. I love it when a hotel has a bathroom scale so that I can weigh myself when I’m traveling too. Hardly any hotels that we can afford to stay in have bathroom scales.

5. I have a really strong stomach for blood and guts. It’s probably from working in vet clinics for so long, but I was kind of like that before. There are a few things that get to me, but even still I don’t get too pukey. I’m also a handy person to have around in an emergency because I don’t freak out until after the moment has passed. Now after having said all that here are a few exceptions: dead birds, mice (living or dead), other people’s snot (I’m cool with my own). If you come after me with any of those things I will scream like a girl.

6. People who don’t take care of their pets properly; don’t take them to the vet regularly, don’t train them properly, leave them outside all the time, don’t get them spayed or neutered, piss me off. My cousin’s husband (such an asshole) claims to “breed” St. Bernards, but he really just has a kennel full of sad drooling giant dogs that hardly ever get petted or loved. He treats them like livestock and they pee themselves and jump all over you whenever you go near them, thus making people less likely to ever come near to pet or love on them.

7. I hate camping or doing anything that may cause me to get a tick, require me to go without bathing or wearing make-up or relieve myself outdoors. I don’t mind a good day of hiking, biking or other outdoorsy activities that might make me sweat (I can always wear waterproof make-up), but don’t ask me to do those things and then not have a proper shower or flushing toilet. I’ll take a fully plumbed cabin or a room at the lodge please.

Rebel that I am, I'm not going to tag anyone else, but hope that you will take it upon yourselves to meme at will. (Tara, I know you are good for these, and how about you Evil-E, are you up for it? - you guys are semi-tagged).