Tuesday, March 25, 2008

It Couldn't Be More Random

I don't have a lot of time this morning, but I feel like posting a little something something, so this will be pretty random.

1. While driving thru lovely Rockford, Michigan with Frenchie and Nature Boy the other day I pondered aloud, as we drove by a nail and tanning place in a strip mall with a big sign that said "California Nails", what mental image the name "Michigan Nails" would conjure. We had a good laugh over it because it wasn't a good mental image. But it's not like the women in California have cornered the market on having pretty fingernails, or like the women in places like Michigan, Wyoming or Arkansas have skanky fish guts under their nails or something.

I do however see the wisdom in not naming your tanning salon "Wisconsin Tan".

2. I have a love/hate relationship with the show/train wreck "House Hunters". I watch this show in the same way that MDH watches "Face the Nation". I yell at the TV, and boo and jeer at the dumb people in their bad outfits making bad real estate decisions. Where do they find these people? What is wrong with them? Why do they always seem to choose the most boring home and complain about the stupidest things like paint color and construction noise? Buy some paint MORON! Construction will eventually end DIPSHIT! I also get annoyed by the people's apparent love affair with granite counter tops and stainless steel appliances.

These people have ecru pile carpet on their hearts. I can't take it, and yet I can't stop watching.

3. Why do my neighbors, seemingly all of them, never use their garages? All of the houses on this street have 2 car garages and everyone parks their cars in the street. What's up? Are my neighbors all hoarders who have filled their garages to the brim with shopping bags from the dollar store, leaving no room for their automobiles? Curious.

When we moved to Michigan, my single demand was that our home have covered parking for my car. Preferably a garage. The idea of scraping 10 inches of snow off of my car every other day was unbearable to me, and yet I see my neighbors scraping snow off of their cars which are parked not 20 feet from their garage. Why people? Why?

In keeping with the "random" theme of my post, I closed my eyes and the picture at the top is where my cursor landed in my "My Pictures" folder. That's me from Thanksgiving a few years ago using napkin rings as eyeglasses. I'm a dork. Nothing new about that.


Tara said...

Ah ha, so that's what those are in the photo! Tres chic! :)

I don't have a garage, but I do make it a point to park in the apartment car ports. I don't like my car exposed to the elements anymore than I have to. That last bad storm totally buried the cars that weren't parked in the ports, and even the next day the cars were still buried. You'd think the owner would've at least tried to dig themselves out.

SkylersDad said...

Nice photo, not quite as good as my hat, but good nonetheless.

Anonymous said...

We have a two car garage that we don't use. And yes, it's because they're filled to the brim with crap that we don't want to keep in the house.

Churlita said...

I fantasize about having a garage and not having to scrape every day in the Winter. That and a dishwasher. I REALLY fantasize about having a dishwasher that isn't me.

Family Adventure said...

I share your confusion about people's lack of garage usage. What's the point of having a garage in a country covered in snow 6 months a year, if you're not going to put your car IN it?

And that picture - trendsetting.


Anonymous said...

P and I watched House Hunters last night and the couple were so robotic in their conversation as if they were reading off a script. They kept complaining about how there were no trees in the backyards. Have these people never heard of tree farms?! They kept talking about how nice the houses were and we thought they were pretty plain and basic. They must live in a real hole I guess.

Oh, those garages you mention? I bet they have dead bodies in them. Don't trust your neighbors!

Chris the Hippie said...

We have a tiny little one-car garage. It's small. I mean, it's really small. And someone (I sh*t you not) stole the door off the garage after I had signed the papers and before I moved in, lo these many moons ago. So we DO have a garage, and a driveway too, but we always have one car in the street. Why? Good question.

In the winter we put the "good" car in the garage -- that's the one my wife drives. She goes to work before I do, so I don't want to park the "other" car behind hers in the driveway as we never know from day to day if the "other" car will start or not, and I just don't like the idea of my wife having to scrape the windows and spend time mucking about with the old car just to get it out of the way every morning. So I park it on the street.

In the summer the motorcycle goes in the garage. The hell with the cars.

- said...

i love the picture.

people like to show off their cars. such prize possessions, they are. like, barely anyone has one, so you've gotta show it off when you do. heh.

Quiet one said...

HAD to have at least a two car garage! And yes, people in my neighborhood with the "super garages" (more room for storage) still don't park in the garage. Because they have piles of crap in them. PILES.

Love the picture!

Anonymous said...

I love the garage. No scraping, getting plowed in, no brushing, and the car is not nearly as cold.

Ohio nails....hmmm.

The Lady Who Doesn't Lunch: said...

Tara - As far as I know I am the worlds first supermodel of napkin rings.

Skydad - I will have to check out that hat - if it's made from a placemat that'll make me really happy.

Suze - have a yard sale gal! Park that car indoors! Wait - you don't get that much snow where you are do you?

Churlita - I totally heard that - I didn't have a dishwasher until a few years ago and a garage - forget about it.

Heidi - In addition to having two car garages all of the homes on our street have basements too. I can't imagine that whatever you've filled your garage with is stuff that you are actually using enough to warrent keeping.

SRU - They were a great inspiration for this post.
I wouldn't be the least bit shocked if there were bodies in some of our neighbors garages. I'll know for sure in June when the ice all thaws.

Chris - Well you know who butters your bread now don't you? I kid! You are lovely to be so sweet to your wife. I like the IDEA of motorcycles, but they just mess up my hair.

Player - I had some moments of regret after posting that less than attractive photo of myself so I'm glad you like it. I don't look so great, but I was goofing around and having a lot of fun with my friends - so what the hell.

Hi Michelle - I'll take garage space and not having to scrape my car over shopping sprees and owning too much crap. Gross consumerism is kind of a pet peeve of mine anyway, hence my Nobody Needs This feature I do sometimes.

Evil - Amen broth-ah.

Anonymous said...

I have the same complaints about HH. "Uh, I don't think my couch will go with this paint." Fu**ing dumb asses. I have been saying for about 4 years that granite counter tops & stainless steel appliances will be the avocado green and harvest gold of the future.

The Lady Who Doesn't Lunch: said...

Hey Frenchie! - Having now been in my kitchen you can see how as appliances go I'm less interested in the color and longing for an oven that doesn't have a cobwebs in the built in clock.

Our kitchen in the convent was all stainless, even the countertops and cleaning the fingerprints was never ending.
Stainless = Pain In Ass

Gwen said...

You really hit a nerve with this garage thing, Lady. I, too, wholeheartedly agree. I made sure the garage to this house was USABLE before I signed the papers and I USE it, but everyone else is parked on the street. It's dumb. Maybe they all have boats in their garages.

Unknown said...

HA! I have the same issue with the garages. Yeah, They are making them smaller, but honestly, people- that's where the car is SUPPOSED to go. Folks on my street have huge basements and storage sheds and STILL? They can't get their cars in their garages. One guy has a whole living room set up in his- I often drive by slow at night to see him drinking a cocktail and smoking a cigarette while perched on his workbench staring at the news.

m said...

House hunters people ARE idiots. And they're usually annoying. I can't think of a good example right now, but YEAH, they're total idiots.

(I have just made the Best Comment Ever)

paperback reader said...

Garages are like martial arts: we learn/build them so that we might never use them.

Anonymous said...

Gee, using the garage to park your car? Now that is a novel idea!

The Lady Who Doesn't Lunch: said...

Gwen - I suppose it's none of my affair how people choose to use their garages, but it does bug me to see all those cars in the street for no good reason. Plus sometimes it's hard to back out of my driveway with all those cars in the way.

People around here do have boats, but mostly they are sailboats so they are at the marina I think.

AGT - poor garage man. I bet his wife has decorated all in pink chintz and he has no man space.

Mindy - they are so awful and badly dressed and yet I cannot stop watching the show. Sometimes there are people on it that I really like who make the correct decisions by choosing the house the I liked.

Pistols - I will kill with my bare hands AND park in my garage.

Silver - go figure.

Shan said...

I am with you on the house hunters show. I love when they say things like.. hour two year old would love this closet. Really? Because my two year old really only loves pudding. And yet I cannot stop watching.