Tuesday, May 6, 2008

Communication Breakdown

Churlita's recent post about texting and how some people either love it or hate it, inspired me to muddle over some other communication problems I have, or rather, problems I have with communication.

Communication Pet Peeve #1
MDH seems to think that I have the ability to hear him when we are on opposite sides of the house. He is wrong. I cannot.

I can however vaguely make out that he is speaking in a loud tone and it sounds like a question and ends with what sounds like the words Honey Bunny. This is how I can tell the difference between his frequent random yelling at the television and when he is speaking to me from 1800 square feet away and between 5 walls. Either way, I ignore, yet quietly curse him.

Communication Pet Peeve #2
Although I am guilty of doing this one sometimes myself, I hate it when people try to talk to me while they are yawning. I cannot understand it. I don't tend to think it's funny, especially when it's done over the phone. Everything sounds like "Rawr, yarf eeee rarrrf." I credit my friend Amy for first bringing this to my attention as she used to complain about her ex-huband yawn talking all the time and she ended up passing her peeve along to me.

Communication Pet Peeve #3
When someone calls and I am on the phone with my mother and the call waiting kicks in I do not answer it as my mother thinks that it is rude to put her on hold while I answer another call.

Whatever. I do this for her, she is my mother.

If I'm on the phone with anyone else besides my mom I use it. What grinds my nerves is when I'm on the phone with my mom, purposely not answering the call waiting and the person either keeps letting it ring or keeps calling back, kicking in the call waiting over and over and over and over. It usually turns out to be one of my brother's in law who urgently needs to discuss some Boston related sports issue with my husband. They always deny doing it.

Communication Pet Peeve #4
Getting calls from people who have no idea that they have called you. You can hear them in the background ordering from the Burger King drive thru, talking to someone else (perhaps they are talking about you), or maybe you just hear the vague sounds of paper rustling, music or talk radio.

This person is completely oblivious to the fact that they have called you from inside their purse or pocket and this asshole certainly has no idea that you were in the middle of a serious BM and went running to the phone with your pants around your ankles because you were expecting a call about a job interview.

No? Did that just happen to me? Oh well.

Anyhoo... I imagine that they sat down on their cell phone and accidentally dialed my number with their ass. I am also guilty of this one, but not since I got a flip phone.

Communication Pet Peeve #5
Getting text messages from people I barely know. I used to have a coworker who could never seem to email or call me like a normal person. She was always with the texting and it was always to tell me some bullshit that could have waited. The fact that I don't really understand the texting shorthand and it makes me feel old and farty increases the annoying factor by like 1000%.

Update 05/07/2008 6:24am - realized pre-coffee that in addition to Churlita I should probably credit Catherinette Singleton's recent call waiting post as providing inspiration as well...


Renaissance Woman said...

Great rant! I'm going to think of my own pet peeves and bad habits. Hope they don't fall under random call waiting caller!

evil-e said...

My number one pet peeve in regards to communication is this: If you ask me how I am doing I will lie to you and just say OK. Don't expect me to do the same though. Asking most people how they are doing is like opening Pandora's Box.

i am playing outside said...

i like talk-yawns... but only because i think its funny that people try. if the person does not immediately repeat the sentence after the yawn, thats a big problem.

i am playing outside said...

i just read your comment on SRU's post, about the mouth breathing hillbilly relatives. im going to marry you someday.

Family Adventure said...

The shouting through the house bit rings so true. I ignore but hate, too.

Tara said...

This was hilarious! Thank you for my Wednesday morning laugh. I've been the giver and receiver of yawn talking (should that be yawking?), and now I feel a yawn coming on at the suggestion.

SkylersDad said...

I hate texting, and I hate call waiting. To me, it's just lazy communication.

CDP said...

I love your "I'm a Right Priss" tag, as I am one myself. This cracked me up. Let me add the coworker who knows that I am on the phone with someone and who tries to talk through me to make sure that I tell the person I'm speaking to whatever she thinks I'm going to omit. Because now I can't understand her OR the person on the phone. If it's that important
A. Write a note and slip it to me
B. Call her yourself

-RM said...

My number one pet peeve is pocket dialing...so, I guess the receiver and the caller both hate it. = ).

Step Right Up said...

One of my bestfriends talks to her husband while she's on the phone with me. I hate it! I've hung up on her for it. I'm not talking about a "Hello honey" as he walks in the door. I'm talking about a full fledged conversation.

I hate it when P does not put his mouth over the phone so I can actually hear him. He does this quite often.

Churlita said...

I take phone calls at work all day, and I hate it when people really do want to call me and ask about their application status to a major university and they're still ordering at Burger King. How rude to both me and the Burger King employee.

Linka72 said...

Because I am an old fart..I freakin'HATE texting..I'm too slow on my OLD Nokia "free with plan" phone and the whippersnappers get mad at me..by the time I've composed my reply, they've already replied like 5 times...being old (35) is sad.

Utah Savage said...

Communication pet peeve #1 is the reason I now live alone and have forever sworn off living with any man ever again. That and that I'm now old and probably unattractive. What always got to me about those shouted questions by one of my ex husband s or ex lovers is that it was always something like, "Honey, where are my socks?" Or, "Since you're already up will you bring me a beer?" I grew deaf over the years to these stupid questions. Now I don't even answer the phone sometimes, as I have such selective hearing.

Chris said...

I have several communication peeves... Biggest is when I'm on the phone with a customer and my boss walks up and starts asking me detailed technical questions about another customer's job. I can only listen to one person talk at a time. (My wife, however, can keep five conversations in two languages going at once.)

I also hate people who start talking to me, then walk away, continuing the conversation. Hey, dumbass, I'm over here, dammit! I'm not gonna get up and follow you around just 'cause you gotta pee or something... If you want to talk to me, please come over here and talk to me.

Oh, and I hate people who call me at three in the morning to ask me who that gal was in college fifteen years ago, the one who dated that one guy -- isn't she a lawyer now or something? Dude, it's three in the morning. Unless you or someone you know is actually in flames right this very instant, it'll keep 'till morning.

I'll use the text doohicky if I'm where it'd be impolite to use the phone as it's meant to be used -- like in a crowded bar or club where the person I'm calling would have trouble hearing me. When I played in bands I'd text my wife between sets 'cause she could never understand me over the crowd noise if I called her.

The Lady Who Doesn't Lunch: said...

Ren Woman - what's the fun of a pet peeve if it's not something that you've been known to do too, eh? Can't wait to read what you come up with.

Evil - I totally understand, and I try not to answer this question truthfully unless it's asked by someone who really wants to know. Otherwise I say "marvelous".

Player - all right... I admit that sometimes it's funny, but only when I'm the one doing it.

Player - I probably would have eloped with you if you'd been there on my wedding day, but it would have been illegal you young pup.

Heidi - hey traveler! Glad you're still checking in from the road.

Tara - Glad you started your day laughing! I think that people who yawn talk habitually tend to be people who have to emphasize all the time how hard they work, hence how tired (Assface used to do this.)

Skydad - Don't hold back man, tell us how you really feel.

CDP - I'm totally with you. If you wish to talk to me while I'm on the phone one or more of the following must apply:

- You are bleeding from your femoral artery.

- I am bleeding from my femoral artery.

- You are on fire.

- I am on fire.

Otherwise, slip me a note.

RM - hey! Welcome to my blog. Flip phones are a godsend for this problem. Also turning off your cell phone works.

SRU - Oh yeah! My mom talks to my dad when I'm on the phone with her. I hate that. Rudy Rude. And after all the call waiting I've ignored for her.

Churlita - how terribly busy can people really be that it requires that much multi-tasking?

Linka - yep. I'm too slow too. Can't keep up with these young whipper snappers.

Utah - It's much simpler just to ignore him - I couldn't even think of the The D Word. Besides he goes out of town often enough for me to enjoy myself when he's gone and start missing him before he gets back.

Chris - OOOh that's a good one. The talking and walking away thing... that is totally rude. And texting at a loud night club makes perfect sense to me.

Suze's Sass said...

I don't like when I'm being respectful and not answering the call waiting and the person I'm talking to then talks about my call waiting.

Gwen said...

HA! My mom is the only person on whom I WILL switch over to the other line!

catherinette said...

I heart call waiting, I really do. It's the best thing in the world. Not that I ever use it because I'm so unpopular that I don't get calls from 2 people at the same time.

Aside from my mother and my sister. God that makes me want to shoot myself.

r cubed said...

Great post! I have so many peeves about communication, especially phones. I rarely use the phone, but others insist on annoying me with them--the ringtones, the answering cell phones while in the middle of a conversation, so much more I should write my own post.

Leonesse said...

I do not like LOUD cell phone talking.

sparsely kate said...

Oh it drives me crazy when my kids have a conversation with me. .....in their bedroom while I am out watching the news on TV or something.

I can hear the mumbling, the muffling of voices but bugger if I know what they are saying!
Then they storm out and cry, "You weren't listening to me were you?"

One day I'll train them that a conversation generally happens when you are looking at the other person. Weird, huh?

Great post!!

BeckEye said...

My pet peeve regarding the phone is when people have to talk to someone else in the room while you're talking to them on the phone. My best friend is NOTORIOUS for this. She can't talk to me for 5 minutes without striking up a 2nd conversation with her husband or talking to her dogs.

Anonymous said...

#4 heehee
About 10 yrs ago, this guy at an Arkansas football game kept calling 911 over and over and over. Phone was in his back pocket and everytime he stood up,then sat down, he dialed 911. I think he got fined.

pistols at dawn said...

I hate it when people try to talk to me. Ever.

That sort of counts, I guess. then again, when my old roommate got engaged recently, I learned it not via talking to him, but via a facebook status message. It was nice and non-intrusive.

another good thing said...

Oh, yeah. I am so with you on all of those- I specially hate when the mother has an entire conversation with the kid when I'm on the line waiting .. then I don't know if she's talking to me or the kid when she asks, "Are you hungry?"
Instead of yelling through the house we use the intercom feature on the phone... almost as annoying, but high tech.

Blowing Shit Up With Gas said...

Someday, I'll probably get into texting. So far, I've never texted. I'm a texting virgin.

H. said...

I used to get in trouble for talking while brushing my teeth. I don't think they realized how hard this was for a blond.

Leah said...

Well, I have to admit that I have a very bad habit of starting a conversation in my house with my partner and then walk into the other room or get distracted by something else . . . oh yeah what was I saying? The worst is when I start and then go in the other room only to finish my discussion while brushing my teeth. :-D

As for call waiting, totally against it and caller ID. My home LAN line is old school just the basic phone with no call waiting, caller ID or anything else. Just don't see the need.

I do find texting to be helpful, especially if you are in a meeting or at a conference.

minijonb said...

i think i need to start communicating telepathically to avoid all this txting bs.

Coaster Punchman said...

I also hate the talking-to-you-from-five-rooms-away thing. Oddly enough, sometimes I do it myself and then get annoyed when I can't hear the answer. Works for me.

Eebie said...

Great stuff, 1st time reader thanks to CP...

On that note, CP, do you really have that much space in your apartment? No way! Still, the feeling is understood.

My peeve has long been, "Hang up the phone and drive!" The month I moved to NYC, that became illegal here. Now with no car (cuz I live in NYC), I'm happy and the odds of being hit by some moron talking on the phone makes me happier.