Friday, May 16, 2008

To Do:

It's pretty scary when the top of your to-do list includes "Write Blog Post!" - yes - with an exclamation point, and then you still don't write one.

I have absolutely no good reason for not posting except maybe that I have been:

A. Terribly busy and caught up with the mundane workings of life and feeling enormously guilty about not posting for so long.

B. Entertaining myself in other ways such as watching movies, going to concerts, taking long romantic walks with my husband and generally enjoying myself so immensely that I'd temporarily forgotten all about blog land.

C. Kidnapped by space pirates who look remarkably like Chris Noth

It's actually a combination of all of the above and although I wasn't really kidnapped by space pirates, my personal soothing vibrating neck massager did break last week and I've had to spend extra time and energy dreaming up fantastical imagery to make up for the loss until the new one I ordered arrived in the mail yesterday.

What?

I suppose it is shocking that I have posted about something so very personal - I normally don't make much mention of such devices here on my blog. Maybe you are shocked that I don't keep a spare. Who knows. Either way, let's face it, a broken vibrator is funny. Maybe a little bit sad, but mostly funny.

What's even funnier (or sadder) is the speed at which I hopped online to order another one and how I have practically broken my neck craning to view the front porch for signs of the package every afternoon as I pull into the driveway when I get home from work. Now I really need it to help with my terrible neck pain.

Anyhoo... somehow I have allowed 10 days to go by with no post. That's a record for me and yet I still have nothing much to say.

I almost posted something the other night after MDH got home from seeing John Edwards and Barack Obama speak at our local arena and I was driven screaming in horror from my very own living room. It was the same evening that Edwards gave his official endorsement of Obama and MDH rushed home to watch the news coverage of the event, see if he could spot himself in the crowd on TV and watch what the pundits were saying about the endorsement.

While I admire his passion for politics, personally I've had it up to my neck with the campaigning, but I wanted to share some of my husbands excitement of having seen his candidate so I decided to watch the pundits with him for a few moments until I realized that I was watching a show where pundits were analyzing the analysis of other pundits!

"This is a pundit cluster-fuck and I cannot be party to such nonsense!", I said, haughtily, and stomped off for the shelter of the closest room in the house with no TV in it. I don't have many opportunities to do anything haughtily, so it was a pretty special moment.

I won't have many other opportunities for blog posting next week either as MDH and I are jetting off to sunny Florida for our annual visit with my parental units in The Villages, where every day we will all be drunk by noon, have dinner at 4pm and every night in bed promptly by eight. Actually that's a fib. My mom doesn't wheel out the cocktail cart until well after 1pm.

14 comments:

Del-V said...

Welcome back to blog-land.

The Guv'ner said...

Hahahahaha!!! I hope your "neck" recovers from your loss soon, Lady. :)

Also, what's with that Florida thing? When I visit friends there it's the same thing. Up early, in pool, drunk by lunchtime, drunk again by dinner and in bed by 10. Those wacky sun worshippers. I'm down with it though.

Blowing Shit Up With Gas said...

Best of luck with the new device.

Gwen said...

I missed you so! Sorry to hear about your vibrator. Did you buy a spare when you bought the replacement? You should! And be haughty when you do it.

Drunk by noon, dinner at 4, and in bed by 8 sounds incredible to me. Have a great time, sweetie!

WendyB said...

I want to meet these space aliens. For scientific reasons, of course.

CDP said...

Have a fun week! Be sure to drive 40 in the left lane, and keep your right turn signal on continuously.

Tara said...

Mmm...a Chris Noth pirate...Arrr.

Welcome back!

Churlita said...

Wow. A Chris Noth pirate and a "neck massager"? No wonder you don't have time to blog. I totally understand.

Suze's Sass said...

I love making haughty statements and then storming off. In fact, I'm going to do that right after I stop laughing that you wrote about neck massagers and getting drunk with your parents in one blog post.

Well, I never.....{{stomping off now}}

SkylersDad said...

Did you spend the extra few bucks on the extended warranty on this "neck massager"?

Does it have a pet name? Now that would be a great post!

Anonymous said...

These don't break--I have had mine for at least 10 years--and my--umm--err--neck feels fabulous--

http://www.amazon.com/Hitachi-Hv250r-massager-magic-Wand/dp/B000OREWNU/ref=pd_bbs_sr_9?ie=UTF8&s=home-garden&qid=1210966266&sr=8-9

evil-e said...

Hope your "neck" is OK without its "massager".

Doing other things is quite alright, we all do them.

I cannot take nonsense from these parties.....my election apathy is growing by the day and every time I hear the word "change". I am done, Canada here I come.

Fun post, not bad for a part-timer.

Leah said...

That is so cool that your hubby went to that event! I can just see him so excited about watching the coverage afterward. Funny.

Leonesse said...

Are you taking your massager with you to Florida? Might make up for having to wait until 1pm.