The Crab People

I'm not a big dreamer. Not in a skies the limit, wild horses couldn't stop me goal accomplishing way and also in that I don't dream when I'm sleeping, at least not much that I can remember.

Sometimes I really feel like I'm missing out when I hear other people discussing (or blogging about) their dreams. Like, "cool you flew around wearing a magic bath towel and drank lemonade with Liberace?"

I'm merely well rested.

Dreamers are well rested and also got to go on some nifty adventure while they were sleeping. I call that excellent time management.

Well today for the first time I'm going to blog about my dream. Mainly because I had one. A vivid one and I haven't been awake long enough for it to fade and forget about. So here's my dream:

I was with MDH in what looked like a movie set of some old western town. The sidewalks were wooden planks and the street was dirt. We were walking and with some people we had met who told us that the town was infested with some kind of giant chigger bug the size of your fist that looked like a soft shell crab and attached itself to the back of your neck and took over your body.

No sooner had the people said this than I noticed one on the back of MDH's neck. It had just landed there and hadn't gotten it's claws into him yet, so I knocked it off and we were very relieved but immediately started to high tail it out of town. This was the frightening part of the dream.

We made it home to a house which of course was not our house and everyone there was having a party. In my waking life there is normally nobody else at the house but me and MDH, but in my dream there were tons of people. The one who stands out foremost in my mind is my friend Rachel because she was having an engagement party at our house while we were gone and for some reason I didn't seem to mind. As far as I know in real life Rachel not only doesn't have a key to my house, she is also steadfastly single although she has been dating and getting a lot of attention from the fellas lately.

Rachel was sporting the latest fashion which seemed to be brightly colored home made crocheted shawls like the kind people wore in the 70's, with little puffy yarn balls at the ends of the draw stings. I looked down and I was wearing one too.

Anyhoo... the party was rocking and I was having a great time until I noticed several people come into the kitchen for snacks and they all had crabs on the backs of their necks and the crabs looked like they had been there for awhile. They mostly went for the crab cakes, which had suddenly appeared, and took paper platefuls of Rosemary & Olive Oil Triscuits. They ate the whole box and I was very upset.

The crab people had blank looks on their faces, but otherwise seemed pretty normal, other than the fact that they had a nasty soft shell crab attached to the backs of their necks and a crazed hankering for crab cakes and Triscuits. I said "what's the big deal, having the crabs doesn't seem so bad" and then I cracked myself up.

I felt the back of my neck to make sure I didn't have a crab on it and checked the necks of MDH and all my friends and we were all fine. I called an exterminator to make sure that there weren't any loose crabs crawling around that might jump on my other guests and went back to the business of partying.

I'll take merely well rested if this is what my dreams are like. Crocheted ponchos and crab people? Where's my magic towel? Where's my Liberace?

This dream was a total waste of time and I'm not well rested at all.

Are you still reading this? I hope you'll come back and read my blog again another day anyway. Meanwhile I'm going to go get some coffee.