Sunday, December 21, 2008

Winter Blows


This is the current view standing inside my front door. So grim that I didn't even have the balls to step out onto the porch or even open the storm door to take the picture. I should state for the record that the plow guy was just here not more than 20 minutes ago and the driveway has already disappeared again.

Shitfuckdamn. I hate winter.

The only thing worse than this view from inside my front door is standing there looking at it knowing that I have to go out to the supermarket. We are out of everything. Eggs, milk, orange juice, coffee creamer. The only fresh produce I have at the moment is 3 garlic bulbs and 2 Spanish onions so old they are sprouting green roots.

The only thing worse than this view and knowing that I have to go the supermarket in this mother fucking horrible weather is the thought of maneuvering a shopping cart across an icy, slushy parking lot.

You know what? We are too fat and over indulged in this house anyway. I mean these are tough times and so I need to learn to be more resourceful and make due with what I have instead of all this gross consumerism I've been willingly participating in for so long. Who needs coffee creamer when you have tea? Who needs fresh orange juice when you've got an old grape Kool-aid packet left over from 1992? Besides I just brushed my teeth, why would I want to eat onions?

I'm not leaving the house today and nothing can make me.

17 comments:

SkylersDad said...

Looking great outside your door, I am one of the sick puppies in the world that like snow!

Leonesse said...

You've went out anyway, haven't you?

Dr Zibbs said...

Looks nice. Oh yeah - you don't like snow.

Suze said...

What makes it even worse is that the damn Pizza guy won't deliver in crapy like that.

Frenchie said...

Looks like heaven to me. I LOVE the snow (don't all teachers?).

sparsely kate said...

Oh wow, from an aussie girl I gotta tell you that view is simply STUNNING. It's just so beautiful.

But your tone sounds somewhat un-thrilled, heeehe.

I hope your hubby ventured out and got you lots of yummy treats so you can stay warm and dry and snuggle down :)

Erin said...

Drink the Kool-Aid. I promise you it's still good.

Step Right Up said...

Try having to walk the dog in this weather.

And you're right, who needs onions when the world is freezing?

Churlita said...

Now you know why people stock up on groceries before snow storms. i hate to have to leave my house when it's like that, but I'm afraid it means I'm stuck at home until April here.

another good thing said...

Oh, yes, the shopping cart through the parking lot problem. Often thought when I lived in NH they needed sleds.
Noticed you didn't say you were out of alcohol. Might not have been a bad day after all.

Michelle said...

That really is a GORGEOUS picture! I love snow! But, yeah, we're in the same boat over here and it's FREEZING. Unfortunately we don't have nice big trees here so it doesn't look remotely as nice.

Gwen said...

That looks like a scene from The Shining. Don't go out there. Eat the garlic and drink the kool-aid.

pistols at dawn said...

The streets may be paved with gold, but who wants to go outside with a shovel to check?

BeckEye said...

I've been bitching about the cold and snow here but it hasn't been nearly that bad. I guess I should be happy.

i am playing outside said...

Merry Christmas Lunchlady! Stay warm and enjoy the Koolaid!

Renaissance Woman said...

An onion and old grape Cool-Aid is the perfect meal! No need to deal with the snow...you have all the items to make the perfect meal.

Tara said...

Damn, that is a plethora of snow. Mm...I'll pass on that stuff, thank you.