Deep Dark Depression, Excessive Misery

Gloom, despair and agony on me.

I didn't get the job.

Not only that, but I was informed of it via automated robo-email sent to my gmail account. We appreciate your interest... careful consideration... decided on another candidate. Blah. Blah. Blah.

I see these people every day and have known them for almost a year and they couldn't even be bothered to send me a real email? Motherfuck. It was so impersonal. I cried when I read it. I might cry again thinking about reading it. Bastards.

So I remain a temp. (An angry temp.)

All I can think of is Bag O'Mice, my monumentally stupid old man past retirement age co-worker. How has someone like him remained gainfully employed for so long? We're talking over 30 years. He is a very stupid man.

Do you know I walked into the break room the other day and found him leaning down, with his face almost pressed against the window of the microwave staring at his lunch spinning round and round? He was riveted.

Stick Around for Joy

Don't get too excited. The picture above is my pipe dream - hopefully soon a reality. The before picture is the current state of our living room floor - filthy and stripped bare. The after picture is of our master bedroom floor, which was already refinished when we moved in a few years ago, but the model of what we hope the rest of the floors will look like when the job is finally completed.

Meanwhile my life is in chaos because my house is in a total fuckin' shambles. I want to move somewhere far, far away. To a place where all the rooms make sense. Where the kitchen is the kitchen and the living room doesn't echo and give me splinters.

What feels like an eternity has passed since my darling decided to rip out the nasty carpets in our house. It was a spur of the moment decision even though we have always planned to refinish the floors in our house. We just hadn't planned to start ripping up carpet that very second.

He is not typically a man of action. In fact most of the time he mainly stays very still, so I don't know what came over him. At the time (Labor Day weekend) because he was supposed to be simply shampooing the carpets, I was thoroughly prepared for a carpet cleaning project. We moved all of the furniture and breakable items out of the way and created a situation that I thought would be temporary, like for one day.

I left him alone with the shampoo-er machine for less than 5 minutes and returned to find him wild-eyed and grinning, on his hands and knees, looking up at me and barking proudly "Look at this! - These floors are perfect, why didn't we do this before??"

Because you need a plan crazyman.

To be honest, at first I was kind of excited to finally get the wheels in motion, but that was a few weeks ago and at this point I am tired of living like an animal. Meanwhile, the estimates have all come in, a deposit has been paid and the job has been scheduled - in another 4 weeks.

So I am writing to you now from a cramped space that I have carved out for myself in the office by moving several large piles of crap. I'm going to post some pictures tonight and reassure you that I haven't dropped off the face of the planet. It's just difficult to get in the post writing zone when I'm drowning underneath all of the crap piles.

Here is what used to be my kitchen, filled with all of the crap from what used to be the dining room and some of the crap that used to be the living room... and some other crap that I have just started piling on top of it because I have no fucking idea where to put it anymore...

Here is what used to be the entry way filled with more of some of the crap that used to be in the living room. We have to tilt the pizza boxes to get them through the door. What? You think I'm going to try to cook something in this shithole?

Here is some of the crap I had to move to get into the office, including the ever present shop vac... like those American Express ads, it's everywhere I want to be...

Here is one of the few rooms in the house I can stand to be in... our lovely empty dining room...

Feelin' Groovy

Today, because I'm feeling a little blue and don't feel much like pulling a story out of my dragging ass, I thought I would take you on a little tour of Ladyland and post photos of a few of my favorite things around the house.

First stop - the powder room off the kitchen and the view of what you see when you sit on the can. Black and white photos of Paris in the 1950's that I cut out of an old calendar with an exacto knife and pasted into $5 frames I bought at Cost Plus.

Next Stop - The Den where you see a view of my favorite little nook which includes a painted screen (the other side is painted to look like shelves with old books) with a little Venetian marionette hanging on it, MDH's Superbowl hat from when the Patriots went in 2001, the little side table I trash picked 20 years ago and the lamp Amy got me for my birthday in 2006.

Here is what you see when you sit in my nook - a little thing we like to call "The Dude". MDH kept him as collateral for money loaned to a ne'er do well ex-girlfriend. She still calls sometimes and asks for it back, but he claims eminent domain and also knows she will never cough up the dough she owes him. The Dude is very fragile as he is made from cut and layered styrofoam, so we can't keep him anywhere near heat or sunlight. He really should be kept away from me too, as I have broken him in two different places over the years, betcha can't tell where! I'm crafty.
Now we're in the kitchen where you will see my lovely paint color test on the left that was given a rousing thumbs down by my friend Rachel who thinks I should go for a more vibrant color. I agree, but we're going to try to sell this shitbird of a house in the next couple of years and most house hunters seem to prefer bland. Oh yes, you can also see the most expensive art I have ever purchased - 4 black and white photos of the old North Market in Columbus back in the 1950's, in el cheapo frames I also bought at Cost Plus.

On the other side of the kitchen you will find my favorite cabinet filled with MDH's colorful collection of Comfest plastic beer mugs from every year going back to 1994. I bitch about them because they take up so much space in the cupboard, but really I'm just as sentimental about Comfest as MDH and the bright colors are cheerful. Also note MDH's other kitchen decor contribution - the Three Stooges sketch.

Last stop in the kitchen, my crab clock given to me by Amy for my 40th birthday last summer. She got it in Rehoboth Beach. She goes every summer with her family and always brings me back something cute. She also knows I love clocks.

I was going to post more, but I started to feel a lot better and almost downright groovy - so here's the last one. It's me, in my new favorite yellow sweater with my favorite Beautiful Katamari screen saver in the background and a post it note with the name of my new favorite wine on it (Bourgogne Pinot Noir 2004 Nicolas Potel). I have to go put on some Blistex now, my lips look chapped in the picture.
Have a groovy Monday.